I was sitting in Theory this week and myself and another cohort member were talking about how we seemed to be completely lost. We're reading Karl Marx so it's some pretty historically and philosophically deep stuff. I'm convinced that it's not so much the topic that's hard to follow, but the thought process of the presenters (both the professor and the writer). As we were conversing about this the professor walked in and asked if we were confused. Upon admitting that we were he reassured us by saying, "if you aren't confused you aren't learning."
This certainly made me feel better about what I was viewing as a self-deficiency. I think that's a very core truth that until someone says it to you, you don't really realize the truth in it. So regardless of the fact that half the time I'm sitting in graduate school lectures I find myself asking if I really belong here, this probably is both perfectly normal and positive. I can now take comfort in the face that I don't understand half of what is said. And, those around me either get it, or they do an insanely good job of pretending they do. But, somehow I think everyone else is in the same boat and that we just manage our expressions differently (there's a sociological study for me to do).
Classes are going good. There is a lot of reading. The content has remained interesting so far, which motivates me to keep going. I talked with a second year this morning and he told me, "just think...after next week the quarter is 1/3 of the way over." This both excited me and stressed out a little. All the second-years reassure me that the first year is the hardest, and of the first year the first quarter is the hardest. So, I'm 1/5 of the way through the hardest quarter of my career!
My GTF classes are great also. I certainly have a favorite section, they're amazing. The other group is amazing also, but a little more standoffish. I find myself questioning the differences I use in the teaching methods between the two classes and trying to decide how much of my teaching differences influence their behavior and/or response...probably a large portion of it. Trying to work on that.
Anyhow, sitting in office hours and still no one has come to visit. Although, I'm not surprised. It's Thursday afternoon and a lot of students probably are done with classes for the week. Probably not the best timing on my part. Hope everyone has a great weekend. Cheers to one more week down!
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Sunday, October 4, 2009
My Promise to the Working Class
Let this be a promise, put in writing, that I will not abandon my people for the sake of my own success. I will not buy into these ideas of higher education being about research, individual successes, and how much I can cram into my curriculum Vitae. Instead, I promise to use my education to better the lives of others. To reach out to those who are most like me, living working-class lives, experiencing discrimination in multiple forms, and teach them to better understand their predicament, how to get out of it (if they so desire), and how to help others.
I do not aspire to be a published, well-known professor at a well-known research institution. I do not seek to only further my own research interests, and the research interests of other detached, highly educated, impersonal scholars. Instead, I want my research to speak to people, everyday people. I want my research to tell a story that ALL can understand, not only those with status initials at the end of their name.
Let me remember, at the end of this ordeal, where I come from and where it is I desire to go at this very moment. Let me remember that sociology is about helping those in need, creating social change for the better, and that it is not about the fattening of my personal pocketbook.
I do not aspire to be a published, well-known professor at a well-known research institution. I do not seek to only further my own research interests, and the research interests of other detached, highly educated, impersonal scholars. Instead, I want my research to speak to people, everyday people. I want my research to tell a story that ALL can understand, not only those with status initials at the end of their name.
Let me remember, at the end of this ordeal, where I come from and where it is I desire to go at this very moment. Let me remember that sociology is about helping those in need, creating social change for the better, and that it is not about the fattening of my personal pocketbook.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Start of Fall and Classes
The fall weather began on the exact same day that classes started. It's cool and gloomy, but I really like it for a change. The air is starting to smell like fall here, which is something I miss dearly from living in Michigan my entire childhood. In California it's about 90, sunny, and dry right now. So, I'm feeling this weather. At least for right now...talk to me in December.
Going to my first GTF class today. Looking forward to seeing all the crazy Freshpersons. I also find out today which sections (day and time) I'm teaching, which I'm dying to know since I could be teaching as early as tomorrow. Luckily, my professor who is leading the class seems pretty loose about what and how we teach. I suppose I'll just try and make it as fun as possible, and as interactive as possible and go from there. Gosh, it can't be much different then working with the 3 children at my nanny job for the past seven years. Probably comparable discipline issues. HA! Maybe I'll make a time-out corner in the room!
As far as my classes are concerned, they're alright. I'm learning quickly that professors REALLY like to talk about themselves and really have little to no concern about whether or not you're really getting the material. Please, please, please, don't let me ever get like that. I really don't want to be the type of professor that constantly brags about themselves, rambles on and on, and does so in a manner that the students might as well not even be in the room.
I love reading the theory we've been assigned. Class is supposed to be a seminar, but appears to be more of a lecture format, which is extremely disappointing. I'd much rather speak with the others in my class about their interpretations.
My methods class sounds like it's going to be relatively interesting. Should offer me a well-rounded idea of what my research method options are. Although, I doubt I'll go with anything other then qualitative just because I really enjoy it and that's what my experience is in.
Someone asked me yesterday how I was feeling about school and all I could say was, "amazing." This is exactly what I've always wanted, always dreamed about. It's incredible that I don't have a job outside the university. I don't have to "switch gears" from the academic world to the "work" world. I actually think I'll have less stress in this program then I ever did in undergrad, but mostly because I'm not working full-time while trying to go to school 15+ semester units. I'm so thankful that I got accepted, and so glad that people pushed me to say yes. I'm really looking forward to the next years. And, yes...you can hold that against me later on.
Going to my first GTF class today. Looking forward to seeing all the crazy Freshpersons. I also find out today which sections (day and time) I'm teaching, which I'm dying to know since I could be teaching as early as tomorrow. Luckily, my professor who is leading the class seems pretty loose about what and how we teach. I suppose I'll just try and make it as fun as possible, and as interactive as possible and go from there. Gosh, it can't be much different then working with the 3 children at my nanny job for the past seven years. Probably comparable discipline issues. HA! Maybe I'll make a time-out corner in the room!
As far as my classes are concerned, they're alright. I'm learning quickly that professors REALLY like to talk about themselves and really have little to no concern about whether or not you're really getting the material. Please, please, please, don't let me ever get like that. I really don't want to be the type of professor that constantly brags about themselves, rambles on and on, and does so in a manner that the students might as well not even be in the room.
I love reading the theory we've been assigned. Class is supposed to be a seminar, but appears to be more of a lecture format, which is extremely disappointing. I'd much rather speak with the others in my class about their interpretations.
My methods class sounds like it's going to be relatively interesting. Should offer me a well-rounded idea of what my research method options are. Although, I doubt I'll go with anything other then qualitative just because I really enjoy it and that's what my experience is in.
Someone asked me yesterday how I was feeling about school and all I could say was, "amazing." This is exactly what I've always wanted, always dreamed about. It's incredible that I don't have a job outside the university. I don't have to "switch gears" from the academic world to the "work" world. I actually think I'll have less stress in this program then I ever did in undergrad, but mostly because I'm not working full-time while trying to go to school 15+ semester units. I'm so thankful that I got accepted, and so glad that people pushed me to say yes. I'm really looking forward to the next years. And, yes...you can hold that against me later on.
Monday, September 28, 2009
My First Discussion Syllabus. OMG, so excited!
SOC 207: Social Inequality – Fall 2009
Tracy DeHaan, GTF
Email: tdehaan@uoregon.edu
Office: 630 PLC
Office Hours:
Overview
The purpose of discussion sections is to give students a chance to better understand the course material through dialogue with other students. While I will help to guide discussion and reinforce what I think is important, the responsibility for creating productive discussion sections ultimately lies in your hands. The following is necessary in order for this to happen:
1. STUDENTS WILL BE EXPECTED TO READ THE ASSIGNMENTS BEFORE COMING TO CLASS. In order to be an active participant in the classroom, you must come to class prepared—even if being prepared means simply having questions about what was confusing to you in the readings. Come to class with readings done and bring your book, notes, and a writing utensil to each session. Being prepared means having all the tools you need to participate.
2. DO NOT PLAN TO USE CLASS TIME TO CATCH UP ON NON-CLASS ACTIVITIES. Do not read the sports page, surf the Internet, text ur bff, make your grocery lists, plan your weekend, write letters, sleep, flirt, or catch up with friends. Mentally “checking out” of class in this way will make it difficult to do well in the course and will be disruptive to your classmates. In addition, I will find it highly annoying. If you have a pressing need to do these things during scheduled class time, do yourself, me, and your classmates a favor and just don’t come to class. This is why attendance is not required for your grade. Instead, regular attendance acts as an opportunity for extra points towards your grade at the end of the quarter.
3. CLASSROOM DISCUSSIONS SHOULD REMAIN CIVIL. We are here to learn from each other. It is difficult to learn from someone who is yelling at you, rolling her/his eyes, grumbling under his/her breath, ignoring you, interrupting you, or engaging in other dismissive behaviors. I don’t expect that any of us will be tempted to behave so rudely, but it doesn’t hurt to spell out that these things are out-of-bounds in the classroom.
4. CELL PHONES SHOULD BE TURNED OFF BEFORE CLASS BEGINS. It is highly disruptive when these devices make noise during class time. Please don’t make me act like an elementary teacher and take your phone away until after class. Just kidding. Sorta.
5. AVOID TALKING OVER OTHERS AND CHITCHATTING DURING CLASS. This is a huge pet-peeve of mine. If you need clarification on something, I don’t mind answering questions (if I can). If you are talking about something else, you should do it somewhere else. I reserve the right to ask you to leave or to ask you to sit somewhere else in the room.
Final Comments
I am here to help you. If you have any disability, either temporary or permanent, which might affect your ability to participate fully in the discussion, please let me know right away. We can figure out what accommodations will be necessary to provide for equitable participation.
Don’t be a stranger! I would like to learn a little bit about all of you, including your names. It would help enormously if you would feel comfortable enough to introduce yourself to me before or after class. Be sure to visit me in my office hours or I’ll get bored!
I believe that every single one of you can do well in this class. In fact, I expect you to come with your game face on, to try your best, to put as much into the class as you can and get as much out of this class as you can, to ask for help when you need it, and to work with me to ensure your success.
Finally, I want to stress that ALL students are welcome in my class, regardless of national origin, religious affiliation, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, age, physical challenge, socioeconomic status, or cultural background. Let us work to make our classroom an environment marked by kindness and mutual respect for one another. It is our differences, even more than our similarities, that offer the richest opportunities for learning.
Tracy DeHaan, GTF
Email: tdehaan@uoregon.edu
Office: 630 PLC
Office Hours:
Overview
The purpose of discussion sections is to give students a chance to better understand the course material through dialogue with other students. While I will help to guide discussion and reinforce what I think is important, the responsibility for creating productive discussion sections ultimately lies in your hands. The following is necessary in order for this to happen:
1. STUDENTS WILL BE EXPECTED TO READ THE ASSIGNMENTS BEFORE COMING TO CLASS. In order to be an active participant in the classroom, you must come to class prepared—even if being prepared means simply having questions about what was confusing to you in the readings. Come to class with readings done and bring your book, notes, and a writing utensil to each session. Being prepared means having all the tools you need to participate.
2. DO NOT PLAN TO USE CLASS TIME TO CATCH UP ON NON-CLASS ACTIVITIES. Do not read the sports page, surf the Internet, text ur bff, make your grocery lists, plan your weekend, write letters, sleep, flirt, or catch up with friends. Mentally “checking out” of class in this way will make it difficult to do well in the course and will be disruptive to your classmates. In addition, I will find it highly annoying. If you have a pressing need to do these things during scheduled class time, do yourself, me, and your classmates a favor and just don’t come to class. This is why attendance is not required for your grade. Instead, regular attendance acts as an opportunity for extra points towards your grade at the end of the quarter.
3. CLASSROOM DISCUSSIONS SHOULD REMAIN CIVIL. We are here to learn from each other. It is difficult to learn from someone who is yelling at you, rolling her/his eyes, grumbling under his/her breath, ignoring you, interrupting you, or engaging in other dismissive behaviors. I don’t expect that any of us will be tempted to behave so rudely, but it doesn’t hurt to spell out that these things are out-of-bounds in the classroom.
4. CELL PHONES SHOULD BE TURNED OFF BEFORE CLASS BEGINS. It is highly disruptive when these devices make noise during class time. Please don’t make me act like an elementary teacher and take your phone away until after class. Just kidding. Sorta.
5. AVOID TALKING OVER OTHERS AND CHITCHATTING DURING CLASS. This is a huge pet-peeve of mine. If you need clarification on something, I don’t mind answering questions (if I can). If you are talking about something else, you should do it somewhere else. I reserve the right to ask you to leave or to ask you to sit somewhere else in the room.
Final Comments
I am here to help you. If you have any disability, either temporary or permanent, which might affect your ability to participate fully in the discussion, please let me know right away. We can figure out what accommodations will be necessary to provide for equitable participation.
Don’t be a stranger! I would like to learn a little bit about all of you, including your names. It would help enormously if you would feel comfortable enough to introduce yourself to me before or after class. Be sure to visit me in my office hours or I’ll get bored!
I believe that every single one of you can do well in this class. In fact, I expect you to come with your game face on, to try your best, to put as much into the class as you can and get as much out of this class as you can, to ask for help when you need it, and to work with me to ensure your success.
Finally, I want to stress that ALL students are welcome in my class, regardless of national origin, religious affiliation, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, age, physical challenge, socioeconomic status, or cultural background. Let us work to make our classroom an environment marked by kindness and mutual respect for one another. It is our differences, even more than our similarities, that offer the richest opportunities for learning.
End of "Last Weekend of Freedom"
Well, today brings to a close my "last weekend of freedom." Which, really wasn't all that free. Both of my professors sent me readings to do prior to our first class, including two chapters, an article, and some seriously heavy Karl Marx stuff. I'm definitely excited about it despite the prematurity of it all.
I talked to my mom and one of my best friends on the phone today. It was nice that both of them said I sounded good. In fact, my best friend told me that I sounded the best she'd ever heard me sound. That's great. I feel wonderful. Everyone in the Sociology department is so supportive and positive. They all reinforce my efforts and they help to remove any of the self-doubts I have. And, trust me I have a lot of self doubt. It's a welcome change, I'm not used to being around people who are so positive and supportive, especially in an academic environment.
Started my readings this evening and Karl Marx was an amazing thinker. I've only read 4 of the 60 pages I was assigned, but I feel like I've read an entire book. His work is like that, lots of depth. He's so right on, even 150 years later, about how our production of goods robs us (as individuals) of a rewarding and creative lifestyle. I could go more into it, but I'll spare you. His philosophies on religion also sum up a lot of what I feel, only I could never articulate it in the same manner that he does.
So far in my methods class I am generally surprised by how "easy" my assignments seem. I made it through the intro of the book (the most annoying chapter) and none of the concepts seem foreign to me. Thank goodness I had such an awesome theory teacher, took three methods classes, and a great intro to sociology teacher. I hear their voices and remember their examples as I read through the text. I am surprised at how elementary some of the work/concepts seem and can see where graduate school will be less about learning new information, and more about honing my skills and knowledge into something useful in research.
I meet tomorrow with my professor that I'm GTFing for. Should get the course syllabus and the book. Now, I just need to plan out my first lesson. Little nervous, but I'm sure I'll do fine. Always wanted to be a teacher, just didn't imagine it'd happen this fast.
Here's to a great first week. Wish me luck!
I talked to my mom and one of my best friends on the phone today. It was nice that both of them said I sounded good. In fact, my best friend told me that I sounded the best she'd ever heard me sound. That's great. I feel wonderful. Everyone in the Sociology department is so supportive and positive. They all reinforce my efforts and they help to remove any of the self-doubts I have. And, trust me I have a lot of self doubt. It's a welcome change, I'm not used to being around people who are so positive and supportive, especially in an academic environment.
Started my readings this evening and Karl Marx was an amazing thinker. I've only read 4 of the 60 pages I was assigned, but I feel like I've read an entire book. His work is like that, lots of depth. He's so right on, even 150 years later, about how our production of goods robs us (as individuals) of a rewarding and creative lifestyle. I could go more into it, but I'll spare you. His philosophies on religion also sum up a lot of what I feel, only I could never articulate it in the same manner that he does.
So far in my methods class I am generally surprised by how "easy" my assignments seem. I made it through the intro of the book (the most annoying chapter) and none of the concepts seem foreign to me. Thank goodness I had such an awesome theory teacher, took three methods classes, and a great intro to sociology teacher. I hear their voices and remember their examples as I read through the text. I am surprised at how elementary some of the work/concepts seem and can see where graduate school will be less about learning new information, and more about honing my skills and knowledge into something useful in research.
I meet tomorrow with my professor that I'm GTFing for. Should get the course syllabus and the book. Now, I just need to plan out my first lesson. Little nervous, but I'm sure I'll do fine. Always wanted to be a teacher, just didn't imagine it'd happen this fast.
Here's to a great first week. Wish me luck!
Thursday, September 24, 2009
One week down!
Finished up my first week at school. No class yet, but a whole bunch of orientations. I feel as though I am completely oriented to the school, my job, and my department. Probably a little too much. After four days of orientations I have been inundated with massive amounts of paper. In fact, I think a tree was cut just for me in order to create the massive paper pile on my desk. This actually has created a project for me to complete so that my resources will be well organized in case I ever need them. This is more frustrating them helpful.
Bit of a shock this week when I found out that I'm going to be teaching three discussion groups. Originally I thought this meant I just sit in a classroom and encourage the students to talk about the topics within the lectures, but I'm now finding out that I'm actually teaching content that is relative to the main course. I will have to do a syllabus, create activities and handouts, grade papers, hold office hours, attend the main class twice a week and hold three discussions groups all on the same day. All of this is a bit overwhelming considering I have never taught a class. I know I can do it, and I think I'll be great at it, but I just wasn't mentally prepared for it.
I am also very excited about suddenly and unexpectedly becoming a teacher. Didn't think this would happen for at least 4 yours, but hey...great job experience for when I finally earn my PhD. The class I'm teaching is about social inequalities, which is really my big deal within sociology. I love learning about social inequalities and often take a holistic approach to my research combining race, class and gender issues. I'm looking forward to presenting information to students that will provoke thought and help give them a way to articulate the different experiences they've had in life.
I also have my own office AND keys to the building. This is all very exciting you know! I share an office with another Graduate Teaching Fellow (GTF) who is also first year. He's also from Michigan, so that's fun. Everyone in my cohort seems pretty cool. All very different interests and experiences, which makes for some great conversations and an amazing support group. Everyone in the department, including faculty, staff, and other graduate students have been very welcoming and amazingly friendly.
Yeah, I definitely see this as the type of place I could spend the next 7 years of my life!
Bit of a shock this week when I found out that I'm going to be teaching three discussion groups. Originally I thought this meant I just sit in a classroom and encourage the students to talk about the topics within the lectures, but I'm now finding out that I'm actually teaching content that is relative to the main course. I will have to do a syllabus, create activities and handouts, grade papers, hold office hours, attend the main class twice a week and hold three discussions groups all on the same day. All of this is a bit overwhelming considering I have never taught a class. I know I can do it, and I think I'll be great at it, but I just wasn't mentally prepared for it.
I am also very excited about suddenly and unexpectedly becoming a teacher. Didn't think this would happen for at least 4 yours, but hey...great job experience for when I finally earn my PhD. The class I'm teaching is about social inequalities, which is really my big deal within sociology. I love learning about social inequalities and often take a holistic approach to my research combining race, class and gender issues. I'm looking forward to presenting information to students that will provoke thought and help give them a way to articulate the different experiences they've had in life.
I also have my own office AND keys to the building. This is all very exciting you know! I share an office with another Graduate Teaching Fellow (GTF) who is also first year. He's also from Michigan, so that's fun. Everyone in my cohort seems pretty cool. All very different interests and experiences, which makes for some great conversations and an amazing support group. Everyone in the department, including faculty, staff, and other graduate students have been very welcoming and amazingly friendly.
Yeah, I definitely see this as the type of place I could spend the next 7 years of my life!
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Getting used to my new surroundings
Well, I moved up here on Wednesday. The drive up was mostly uneventful except for the very large pebble that smashed into my windshield creating a crack that only grew larger as I traveled longer. Luckily, I can say that was the worst part of the drive. Doesn't help much that my car is far from aerodynamic. Both Gizmo and I arrived safely and unharmed. We were tired, and slightly disoriented, but we were fine.
When I first arrived I felt very out of my element. My new place felt wrong and awkward. I found myself wanting to go "home" but soon realized I was home...it just didn't feel like it yet. It's hard to explain the anxieties you feel when you suddenly don't have that comfortable place to retreat to after a long, exhausting, and emotionally draining day.
For the most part I am feeling better. A couple of days of being cooped up in my new apartment and spending some time decorating it to my liking has certainly helped. The change in living environment is quite drastic. My apartment is twice the size and about 2/3 the cost of my previous place. This means I have my own office for studying and working, which I am still in the process of setting up. It's also odd not to have a job. I'm lost now that I'm only doing my own laundry, my own dishes, and my own grocery shopping.
So far this experience has been bittersweet. It's been 5 months coming to this point and I've done nothing but speculate about how I would feel when this day came. Now it's here and it's exactly what I thought it would be. Exciting, depressing, stressful, and rejuvenating. It's amazing what we learn about ourselves when we're forced to look at our life and its future dead in the face.
When I first arrived I felt very out of my element. My new place felt wrong and awkward. I found myself wanting to go "home" but soon realized I was home...it just didn't feel like it yet. It's hard to explain the anxieties you feel when you suddenly don't have that comfortable place to retreat to after a long, exhausting, and emotionally draining day.
For the most part I am feeling better. A couple of days of being cooped up in my new apartment and spending some time decorating it to my liking has certainly helped. The change in living environment is quite drastic. My apartment is twice the size and about 2/3 the cost of my previous place. This means I have my own office for studying and working, which I am still in the process of setting up. It's also odd not to have a job. I'm lost now that I'm only doing my own laundry, my own dishes, and my own grocery shopping.
So far this experience has been bittersweet. It's been 5 months coming to this point and I've done nothing but speculate about how I would feel when this day came. Now it's here and it's exactly what I thought it would be. Exciting, depressing, stressful, and rejuvenating. It's amazing what we learn about ourselves when we're forced to look at our life and its future dead in the face.
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